As a teenager I remember not wanting children at all. I hated babysitting for the most part. Small children made me angry – I always thought that meant I would be a terrible mother. I remember girls in school talking about having kids and I thought: that will never be me. I don’t know when the turning point came – sometime in my mid-twenties when I was dating a guy who I knew would not be the father of any future children. Then, visit web during a bout of singleness I did something very out of character – I was shopping and bought an outfit for a baby girl. I kept that outfit for years, steroids always pulling it out when I was going through one of my purges and thinking I should get rid of it. I mean, cure even if I had a girl what were the chances of it fitting at the right time? Still, I would put it away and think; you never know.
Exactly one year ago today I went to the hospital for a scheduled 1 p.m. cesarean. The baby was breech and I was scared. The surgery kept getting bumped for emergencies. I hadn’t eaten since 10 p.m. the night before. I was nervous. I was weak from hunger. I was drugged to the teeth. I was HAVING A BABY.
In our boy-dominated family I had convinced myself that we were having a boy. Even while I was pregnant I didn’t buy anything remotely girly. When someone said “It’s a girl” I started bawling – although not as much as Moira.
I got my Moira.
And somehow this little bean:
Has turned into this:
And that outfit, purchased seven or eight years before her birth, was the only thing I bought my daughter for the longest time (due to generous people constantly buying her things). The outfit was a heavy plaid one-piece with Scotties embroidered on it complete with matching hat. Absolutely perfect, it turns out, for a baby girl born in April with a winter wedding to attend.
You never know.
So here we are baby girl – one year later. Your father says having a baby is a good example of Darwin’s Survival of the Fittest principle – it is our job to keep you alive no matter how hard you try to thwart us. It is your job to turn our lives upside down, take away our sleep, test our relationship and increase the love in our hearts tenfold. So far, so good.
(For the latest Moira video: Moira vs the SnackTrap click here.)