Category: Cancer

100 Day Project – Days 37 -39

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Covid-19 edition of the ugly bathroom tile selfie. I started doing these years ago to track the progress of my post-chemo hair growth.

This week we passed the 60 day mark of isolation. This week we didn’t get a lot of schooling done. This week I didn’t get a lot of writing done either. I’m not even sure where the week went but now it is Friday night and I am trying to get a blog post done so I don’t let too many days slip by.

Oncology was fine. I got more drugs. Always more drugs. I am, in fact, embarrassed by the amount of pills I have to take. Pain killers (more than one type). Chemotherapy pills. Anti-nausea pills and now heartburn pills to offset the side effects of chemotherapy. Sleeping pills so I don’t lay awake all night thinking about my mortality. I was also give anti-inflammatory pills this week because of back spasms but reading the list of side effects from these anti-inflammatory pills and these anti-heartburn pills makes me think I should just put up with the heartburn and back spasms. Soooo many drugs and then more drugs to combat the side effects from those drugs that come with their own side effects. All this for a woman who would barely take an Ibuprofen before getting cancer.

But all in all this week wasn’t too bad. It’s my week off chemo so I’ve had spurts of energy and during those spurts I have sanitized the dishwasher, scrubbed out the fridge, and started organizing the pantry. And then I use up all my spoons and have to lay down and doze for a while but at least I had the spoons in the first place to use up. (If you haven’t heard of the Spoonie theory here is a link to an article about it.)

Now I’m off to put Oonagh to bed and watch the second half of Return of the Jedi because I can’t seem to stay awake through a full movie these days.

How was your week?

(These current blog posts are part of my #100dayproject and are written quickly and posted without significant editing. They are what they are, mistakes and all. Much like me.)

100 Day Project, Days 29 & 30 – Cake & Chemo

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Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.

At some point between Monday and Tuesday this new round of chemo decided to take effect in a big way and I woke up feeling like I didn’t sleep at all. I’ve got those heavily lidded eyes that sound romantic in cheesy novels but mostly just make me look slow and sleepy – which is exactly what I am. I made Lazy Cat Kitchen’s Vegan Chocolate Torte with Amaretto yesterday but I ate too much at lunch to have any of it – or to even eat dinner. Today at lunch I tried not to eat too much but I’m once again uncomfortably full which means it has less to do with the amount of food I’m eating and more to do with chemo side effects. I thought it was homeschooling and chores that were kicking my butt but it’s the combination of everything mixed in with my medication.

I will admit I’m not the biggest chocolate fan so I wasn’t really making this cake for me anyway. I mean, I made it because I wanted to make it, but I also made it with the chocolate lovers in the family in mind. It is luscious and fudgy and definitely a hit. It would probably be a good cake to pull out for Father’s Day or Mister’s birthday since he’s a big chocolate and almond lover.

The reason I searched out this recipe was a very large bag of slivered almonds in our pantry. I’ve decided right now is the time to start going through our over-packed pantry and find uses for all the obscure ingredients that have been gathering dust. The other day I made barley pudding for breakfast (kind of like rice pudding) because of an abundance of barley, a bag of stale raisins, and a can of peach halves.

I will probably make the barely pudding again so I can tweak it and then post the recipe if anyone is interested.

(These current blog posts are part of my #100dayproject and are written quickly and posted without significant editing. They are what they are, mistakes and all. Much like me.)

100 Day Project, Day 23

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Well I did it. I made very ugly untraditional Onigiri today. I didn’t have any Umeboshi (Japanese pickled plums) but I did have mushrooms and fake chick’un from a local company. I used short grain brown rice too which has always been sticky enough for sushi and it worked fine for this. They don’t look pretty but there were no leftovers and Oonagh declared it the best lunch ever.

Now that the days are nice I’m trying to spend as much time sitting outside as I can. That still doesn’t amount to much time but there is something satisfying about taking my tea outside for a while. It would probably be even more satisfying if I left my phone inside instead of feeling the need to take photos of everything but it’s a hard habit to break.

Tonight the Mister took me for a drive so I could play PokemonGo for a while. I hadn’t been away from the house since Friday. He gets out every day for a run or a walk and we get the girls out most days (they all go for a walk or a bike ride around the neighbourhood) but my life had already shrunk before this isolation happened and I have to remind myself that there is a world out there beyond my walls and my phone.

We even had a dumpling fairy in the form of my friend Jocelyn show up for a chat (and dumplings from Hearts Choices vegan cafe) today. She has been spending a lot of time running errands/getting groceries for people who cannot and added us to her list today even though I told her we didn’t need dumplings (although we always want them). Visits have been far and few between and I’m usually okay with that (especially these days when there are children around all the time and half the day is spent in lessons) but seeing a good friend made a nice change.

I don’t know if it is the dexamethasone that has given me so much energy this week. It’s an anti inflammatory steroid that I used to take with my IV chemo. It makes my face red and keeps me awake all night (or would if I didn’t have sleeping pills to help) but seems to be making me able to do more this week. Not sure I want to be on it long term though – steroids can be tricky. Plus it gives me heartburn so I’m trading one thing for the other. And I’m still in pain most of the time but obviously less pain (or in a different location than last week) or I wouldn’t be able to get as much done. I guess one good week is a decent trade off for all the crappy weeks I have had leading up to this week.

We made more Sunshine Sauerkraut today too. Moira and I are addicted. It doesn’t help my heartburn at all to eat it but it is just soooooo good. This is currently my favourite breakfast. I need to go to bed now so I can get up and eat it again.

(These current blog posts are part of my #100dayproject and are written quickly and posted without significant editing. They are what they are, mistakes and all. Much like me.)

100 Day Project, Day 15

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The good news of the day is that I caught two shiny Feebases (Feebasi?) and one shiny Wobbuffet which only means something to people who play PokemonGo. Plus I head that there is a new Fraggle Rock coming out – or at least a series of short Fraggle Rock episodes about the Fraggles isolating in their own caves but still having fun to show all us sad sacks how it is done.

This helps block out some of the negative like the fact that radiation is kicking my butt and made me puke up my lunch after I got home. Only two more sessions left for now. In the long run it is supposed to help but it is one of those “it is going to get worse before it gets better” situations. I feel like I am constantly on the edge of a panic attack and the only time I’m not is when I’m in the middle of a panic attack. I should actually be laying down right now but the Mister just made popcorn so instead I am typing here and jamming handfuls of popcorn in my mouth as though it is a competition to see how fast I can eat it.

But now the popcorn is done and it is indeed time for me to go and lay down on my heat pad on one side of me and an ice pack on the other and read until I can’t keep my eyes open anymore. I wish you all a restful sleep tonight.

100 Day Project, Day 13

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I spent most of the day laying flat on my back in bed. The times I wasn’t I was trying to sit outside to enjoy our belated spring weather. I think laying flat is the best thing for me right now though. Too much upright time is hard on my fractured sternum and if I’m laying flat I can breathe properly. I decided that I am going to try and keep working on my sock while laying flat. I figure if Frida Khalo can create glorious works of art while laying down and in constant pain I can knit a sock. I didn’t get a good photo of this sock today and it is too late now. I’m a natural light photographer – which means I’ve never been able to figure out how to work a flash properly.

Oonagh got over her fear of riding her bike today. If nothing else that makes today a good day.

Tomorrow starts a week of radiation. The hospital is trying so hard to follow all the Covid-19 guidelines I feel like I should write a post about that. I heard one of the girls talking on Friday about how every day the guidelines change: one week they were giving every one gloves to wear, but last week it had been decided that gloves were not as effective as washing your hands repeatedly. I wonder what new guidelines this week will bring.